My One Little Word - It's My Turn

Thank you to Two Writing Teachers for creating a place to share our Slice of Life. Read more slices or add you own here.

I have enjoyed reading the stories about people choosing their one little word and how the words found them.  I have a story too.  It is nothing profound or special, but it is mine.

My one little word sits quietly on a tripod, each leg representing a moment that whispered to me as I searched for my word.

The first "little word moment" happened when we were putting the ornaments on the Christmas tree.  I wrote a post about how hard it was this year because my children are becoming adults, and we are reaching a different stage of parenting.  I received so many comments from blogging friends who are on the other side of this life moment, telling me it was going to be OK.  Both of our kids are graduating this year, our daughter from college and our son from high school.  This is a turn in the road we knew would be here, but coming much too soon for our liking.

The second one happened at a family Christmas gathering.  I started experiencing some heart palpitations.  I have had these before so I wasn't overly concerned.  But I started thinking, "What if it is different this time?  What if this really is something?"  I knew my little word was whispering to me.  I just didn't know what it was saying just yet.

You see, I am a doer.  I always have been, and probably always will be.  It is how I am wired.  If I had a DNA test done, I am sure somewhere in the report I would have a "doer" chromosome.  But this Christmas I realized that doing for others hasn't always the best thing for me.  Doing for others and neglecting myself has taken its toll on me both physically and emotionally.

With all the many "people" I have to be, I stopped taking care of me.  I stopped doing things for me.  I stopped being me.  I know to some, this may sound selfish.  But I can't be all those other people if I lose sight of who I am, who I want to be.

This leads me to the third leg of my tripod holding my one little word.  Being a mom, a wife, a sister, a teacher and doing all of these things for others have been very rewarding.  But I have been missing something.  I think many one little words lend themselves to the spiritual side.  Mine does too.

Holly Mueller started Spiritual Journey Thursdays on her blog.  I was hesitant to participate for many personal reasons.  The main one was because I wanted a different place and space for my journey to reside.  I knew I needed to somehow connect God with my writing, my heart, and this new community, but I didn't want to mix it with my teaching blog.  So, I started a new blog.  Please visit me at Turn to read more about this leg of the tripod.

I knew these three events were significant in my search, but trying to find a commonality and to understand how to connect them with one little word was not easy.  One day I was on Ann Voskamp's blog, A Holy Experience, and reading the post The Best Way to do the Christmas Cleaning and there it was - my word.

She was writing about When I read her words, "How when you are turned away from God, life turns ugly, but when you are turned toward God, life turns lovely." I knew had found it.

TURN

This year will be filled with new TURNs in this messy thing we call life.  

This year it is "my TURN" - a time just for me.

This year I will TURN toward God to help me accept the TURNs that life sends my way .

I leave you with the lyrics and video of the song "It's My Turn" by Diana Ross.  Although this is considered a love song, I believe there are some powerful lines.  I know I will never stop "doing," but this is my theme song for 2105.  I hope all of you find some time to take your turn in 2015.  We deserve it.

"It's My Turn"

I can't cover up my feelings
In the name of love
Or play it safe
For a while that was easy
And if living for myself
Is what I'm guilty of
Go on and sentence me
I'll still be free

It's my turn
To see what I can see
I hope you'll understand
This time's just for me

Because it's my turn
With no apologies
I've given up the truth
To those I've tried to please

But now it's my turn
If I don't have all the answers
At least I know
I'll take my share of chances
Ain't no use in holding on
When nothing stays the same

So I'll let it rain
'Cause the rain ain't gonna hurt me
And I'll let you go
'Though I know it won't be easy

It's my turn
With no more room for lies
For years I've seen my life
Through someone else's eyes

And now it's my turn
To try and find my way
And if I should get lost
At least I'll own today

It's my turn
Yes, it's my turn
And there ain't no use in holding on
When nothing stays the same

So I'll let it rain
'Cause the rain ain't gonna hurt me
And I'll let you go
'Though I know it won't be easy

It's my turn
To see what I can see
I hope you'll understand
This time's just for me

Because it's my turn
To turn and say goodbye
I sure would like to know
That you're still on my side

Because it's my turn
It's my turn

It's my turn
To start from number one
Trying to undo
Some damage that's been done

But now it's my turn
To reach and touch the sky
No one's gonna say
At least I didn't try

It's my turn
Yes, it's my turn
It's my turn
It's my turn
It's my turn