EJD Night #SOL22

Most Friday nights for me are pizza and crash-on-the-couch kind of nights. 

But not last night! Last night was EJD night, a night with a few of my high school friends. EJD is an acronym for Eight Jelly Donuts, which is what we called ourselves in high school because of pranks we did with jelly donuts. 

The eight of us have been friends for 45+ years, but are scattered across the country, which makes getting together a rare, but special occasion. The last time all eight of us were together was in 2016 although we have had some small groups such as last night.

When we get together, donuts usually find their way into our time together. Last night we met in a small southern town in Indiana that was a midpoint between central Indiana and Kentucky. This small town just happened to have a bakery that was open 24 hours. How serendipitous!

After dinner, we stopped in to grab a donut and coffee for our two-hour drives back to our separate homes. We needed a picture, so we asked an young girl to take it. As we were "posing" someone said something, and we erupted in laughter. We had no idea that she continued taking pictures.

But she captured the true essence of friendship. It's not the pose, but those small moments in-between. 

The joy,

the laughter, 

the gift.

   

Join Two Writing Teachers and other teacher-writers as we 
share a slice of life during the month of March. 

Reagan's Quilt

 

It is April, and I am joining many others in celebrating National Poetry Month by reading, writing,  sharing, and celebrating poetry each day this month. Many years ago I was a quilter. After I began teaching, I had to put my needles and frames away because I just did not have the time. This year I am going back to my quilting roots and will be playing with patchwork-themed poems from memories of my own quilting years to the history of quilts and to quilt patterns. Pull up a needle and thread and let's stitch awhile.

There is nothing like a handmade gift stitched from the heart.

Throughout my quilting life, I gave away more quilts than I kept. Baby quilts were my favorite although many times I didn't get them finished before the babies were born. And the friend or relative whose delivery was timely...well, they just lucked out.

Twenty years ago, a dear high school friend of mine (and an EJD) had a baby, and she was the recipient of one of my quilts. It is actually my favorite of all the baby quilts I have made. The pattern is called Baby Bricks, and it was made out of 1930's reproduction fabrics--pastel colors with fun, whimsical prints. I used cotton batting which gave it an antique look, which I adore.

When I decided on my poetry project, I knew I wanted to feature this quilt, but I only had one picture of it, which was taken on an old Kodak camera. I messaged my friend and asked if she had any pictures of it. I can't tell you the joy I felt knowing that she actually still had the quilt, AND it hadn't fallen apart! As her husband finished taking the photos to send to me, he said, "This is irreplaceable." 

And so are friends!

I paired this quilt with a Nonet poem, a nine-lined poem with an additional syllable in each line. I tried to give the appearance of brick steps.

Reagan's Quilt

A

baby,

a blessing,

a gift from God.

Twenty years ago,

you wrapped her in this gift,

a gift from my hands and heart.

The tiny steps on baby bricks

mark the beginning of her journey.

A big thank you to all of those at Two Writing Teachers for creating and supporting a community for teacher-writers. 

The Sparkle

If you are a long-time reader of this blog, then you know about the EJDs. If you are a newcomer, then let me introduce you to my group of high school friends.

Eight of us have been friends for a very long time. Some for over 45 years. EJD stands for eight jelly donuts. We began calling ourselves that sometime during our junior year because...well, there are eight of us, and we used to do "innocent pranks" with jelly donuts.

This past weekend, five out of the eight got together again for two days of laughing, eating, and relishing in friendship.

It has now become a custom that creative gifts are exchanged. This year was no different.

One of the gifts was a specially made mask. It says, "EJD 2020" and the 0s are donuts.

After we took our picture, I sent it to my daughter. She texted, "Are you smiling?"

I thought to myself how dumb that really was and replied, "Oh, yeah. I guess we didn't realize that no one could tell we were smiling with the masks on."

She says, "Oh, I knew."

"How did you know?"

"I could tell by your eyes. They all sparkle."

Sparkle.

Yes, our eyes did sparkle because we were with people we loved, and our joy in the time spent together couldn't help but bubble up and make our eyes sparkle.

This moment made me think about returning to school. Masked. Where no one can tell I am smiling unless they look at my eyes.

I hope they see the sparkle.

I’m joining an open community of writers over at Sharing Our Stories: Magic in a Blog. If you write (or want to write) just for the magic of it, consider this your invitation to join us. #sosmagic

Friends and Scrabble Boards #SOSmagic

Humans are wired for connection. Many times this connection comes from our families, but often our friends fill this need too.

I have many groups of friends from teaching friends to online friends to family friends to longtime high school friends. They have all shaped who I am during the different stages of my life. I can't imagine my life without any of them.

If you have been a long-time reader of my blog, you know about my high school friends - the EJDs, also known as The Eight Jelly Donuts. Most of us have been friends for over 40 years even as we have lived from all four corners of the country and from one coast to the other.

Together, we have been through marriage and divorce, birth and infertility, eating disorders and addiction, cancer scares and death of parents, career changes and life changes, grandkids and menopause. And through it all, we have remained friends.

We have zoomed several times during this isolation period. Angie, my friend-turned-sister-in-law has been "playing" a new kind of Scrabble game. She chooses a theme for a board and builds words to fit that theme while challenging herself to use all of the letters. This is her EJD board.

This board reminds me of my students. I worry about them. Middle school is a time for change not only physically, mentally, and emotionally, but also socially. This is the time when friend groups change. Elementary friend groups evolve into middle school groups, which can set the course for many years ahead.

I have had students tell me the worst part of this pandemic is not being able to be with their friends. I have parents who are allowing kids to see each other while other parents are not. In the middle of this, kids are trying to figure out where they belong. Some feel their friends are changing and some are moving on without them. Some are trying to hang on to the friends they have while trying to understand who their true friends are.

Middle school life is messy even without a pandemic.

I worry.

They are searching for connection. They need connection.

I reassure them by telling them my own friend stories while they are rewriting theirs. Life revision is hard. They are beginning to place the tiles on their own Scrabble boards. In the years to come, I want them to be able to use all of the letters and to connect all of their words in their own beautiful stories.

And I pray that they become blessed with their own EJDs.

One of Us #sol18

Join Two Writing Teachers and other teacher-writers as we share a slice of life every single day in the month of March.


I have written about my high school friends in several posts.  Although we live in places throughout the country, we have been friends for almost 40 years. We get together every couple of years, and since I began blogging, I have documented our times together. 

I wrote about our Homecoming celebrations; how we recreated our junior prom picture - 34 years later; turning 50 together and the power of our friendship; and our social media of the 1980's - writing notes.

We began calling ourselves the EJDs, or eight jelly donuts, in high school, and we affectionately refer to that name still today.

A few years ago, one of us had a bracelet made with each of our birthstones. It is a gift each of us treasures.  The bracelet not only symbolizes our friendship, but also our collective strength.

This past year, one of us began to experience some health issues. One of our links was weakened. Yesterday, one of us was home to visit and those of us who live close by got together for lunch. 

For almost three hours...

We laugh.

We cry.

We remember.

We find joy in the forgotten.

Tears begin to slip as we say goodbye.

We hug tight.

We send our strength to the one of us who needs it.

And we know in our hearts,

our friendship

is strong,

and yes, 

our story continues.

Bits of Tradition

Thank you Two Writing Teachers for creating this space for me to share my corner of the world.

It's that time of year.  Pumpkins on porches, falling leaves, sweater-weather days, and Friday night football games.

It is also a time for homecoming, and in my hometown, homecoming is huge.  It is so big, one year we had CNN arrive on our doorsteps to film a documentary.

Hundreds of people return to share laughs, stories and memories.  Students build floats, and classes from every five years come back to ride in the parade.  Alumni from 50-60 years back come home to rejoin and celebrate the traditions.  One year we had a gentleman representing 75 years. Now, THAT is tradition.

When my friends (the EJDs) and I turned 50, we had this picture taken in front of the building.

Later that year, our old high school was tore down.  We learned we must embrace change and progress while holding tradition in our hearts. 

Bit by bit, 

brick by brick, 

the building came down.  

Photo courtesy of Travis Connor

Photo courtesy of Travis Connor

Even amidst the ruble, tradition lives on.

On my mantle sits a jar of bits.  Bits of laughter.  Bits of memories.  Bits of stories. Bits of tradition that I will always hold dear.

Flashback 1982

Thank you Two Writing Teachers for creating this space for me to share my corner of the world.

Eight jelly donuts.  To all of you these three words have no importance or significance whatsoever.  You may not even like jelly donuts.

For me, these three little words hold so much laughter and so many memories.  You may think that is quite odd.  I would too.

Eight jelly donuts, or more affectionately called the EJDs, are my high school group of friends.  Yes, there is a story behind that name, and when I told some of my colleagues about how we arrived at the name, they were shocked.  They couldn't believe that I would do something like that.

The eight of us were behind many pranks using jelly donuts.  My favorite memory is making a banner for our homecoming game that said, "EJDs say smear 'em!"  That pretty much explains it all.

Several weeks ago, we had a reunion of sorts.  The eight of us got together for a weekend, as we do every couple of years.  

We laughed until we cried, and then laughed some more.  

We ate until we were stuffed, and then ate some more.

We stayed up late, and got up early.  

We soaked in every single minute of our time together.

The best part of these weekends together is that time seems to stand still.  We always pick up right where we left off.  The only thing that really changes is the topic of some of our conversations.  We have gone from having babies, to busy mom schedules, to needing reading glasses, to sending kids off to college, to being grandmas, to colonoscopies and menopause!

This time, two of my friends decided it would be fun to recreate our senior prom picture.  They gathered up prom dresses from their own girls and from friends of theirs.  Can you just imagine 50-something year olds trying on prom dresses that really belong on 16-18 year old young ladies?  

This is one of the many times where we laughed until we cried, but we had so much fun trying to zip up those dresses!  

So may I present to you Prom Night 1982 in the year of 2016!

SOLC #5 The Power of Teenage Friendships

The Slice of Life March Challenge is hosted by Two Writing Teachers.

Yesterday I wrote about the notes I had saved from high school.  Today, I introduce you to the authors of those notes.

When I was growing up, our town had six elementary schools which fed into one junior high school.  It was during those junior high years when friendships started to change.  It was a scary time because we could easily fall in with the "wrong crowd." My group evolved throughout the next several years, some friends leaving and new ones joining.  The summer between my freshman and sophomore years, I found my group and the eight of us have been friends since.  

We call ourselves The Eight Jelly Donuts, also known as the EJD's.  Our name came from mischievous pranks we did with jelly donuts, but that is another slice.

Junior/Senior Basketball game - I am the third from the top.

We graduated from high school in 1982, and our lives took different paths. Some of us went away to college, while others shared those college years in our hometown.  Some married and started families.  Some moved away to different points across the country - California, Texas, Virginia, Illinois, while others stayed in Indiana. One (me!) even married another one's brother!

Our Senior Prom - I am the third from the right.
And I have no idea why we have our
garters below our knees.

Then...

life happened, and time between gatherings stretched out, just like the miles which separated the eight of us.  We went through a period of time where some of us lost contact with each other.

The year 2000 was approaching, and we decided to celebrate the millennium together that summer.  Seven of us reunited for the first time in close to 15 years.  That weekend was like a two day slumber party - you know, the kind where slumber isn't even thought about.  We had years worth of catching up and lots of reminiscing to do.  Our time together felt like time had stood still, and we were back in our bedrooms, basements, family rooms, and cars sharing secrets and laughing until our stomachs hurt and tears streamed down our faces.  And of course there were jelly donuts!

The EJD's celebrating together 50 years of life.

The last time all of us were together was the fall of 2013 to celebrate the year we turned 50. We went back to all of our teenage hangouts and took pictures like this one in front of the doors of our high school.

There are times when I wonder if we would have become friends had we met for the first time as adults.  I don't think so.  We are different now than who we were as kids, but that is the power of teenage friendship.  I have had many friends throughout my life, but none like the ones I had when I was 13.  Once those friends are in your heart, they have a forever place.

Those are my EJD's.

And that's the power of teenage friendships. 

As teenagers we shared
first loves and heartbreaks, coming of age and becoming young women.

As adults we have shared
weddings and divorces, childbirth and infertility, life and death.

And through it all we have shared
love, laughter and friendship.

To my EJD'S - I know you are reading this, and I want you to remember...

SOLC #4 Social Media ~ 80's Style

The Slice of Life March Challenge is hosted by Two Writing Teachers.  

Today, kids are inundated with the pressures of growing up with social media.  They have texting, email, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat.  With the click of a button, they give the entire world access to 

their words, 

their thoughts,

their pictures,      

their life,

and they have access to the entire world.

Flashback 35 years ago...

A bag of notes from my high school years.  

Back in the 80's we had social media too.

We had notes.  With the meticulous folding, creasing, and tucking of notebook paper, our friends had access to 

our words,

our thoughts,

our pictures,

our life,

and we had access to our own little world.

 the only world that mattered
when we were teenagers.

Here is our text talk - we would use the first letter of a word
to write messages and see if our friends could decode them.

Unlike today's kids, we didn't have to worry about our notes being exploited in the hands of the world ~ only the hands of our teachers or the person who we were writing about...and we were usually writing about someone.

I am still friends with the seven authors of these notes, and that is tomorrow's slice.